Well, isn't karma a B?
After cracking on Jim Abbott in my last post, I have now lost the use of my right hand. Oh the irony. Let me just say I had a hell of a weekend. Flag football resulted in a disappointing 13-6 loss, despite my 40-50 yard touchdown reception in coverage and another nearly 80 yard catch and run on my part where I was chased out at around the 5. So, we had a chance to score to tie the game with under a minute to go and our QB overthrew a wide open receiver in the end zone to be picked off. On top of that, I broke my middle finger and had a slight groin pull during the football game.
To make matters worse, my attempt to soften the pain of the groin injury resulted in me nearly passing out from pain. Let me explain. While sitting down, I decided to apply some IcyHot to the inner part of my thigh, not thinking that when I stood up my testicles would be brushing against that part of my thigh. About 30 seconds later, I'm writhing about on the floor in the worst pain of my life. Although I must say, this sounds like a good torts hypothetical. There certainly is no warning in the tube that says "Do not apply this product to your genitals."
So to sum up my wild weekend for the lazy reader out there here are the Cliff's Notes:
1) Broke my middle finger.
2) Mild groin strain.
3) Nearly IcyHotted my balls into oblivion.
To make matters worse, my attempt to soften the pain of the groin injury resulted in me nearly passing out from pain. Let me explain. While sitting down, I decided to apply some IcyHot to the inner part of my thigh, not thinking that when I stood up my testicles would be brushing against that part of my thigh. About 30 seconds later, I'm writhing about on the floor in the worst pain of my life. Although I must say, this sounds like a good torts hypothetical. There certainly is no warning in the tube that says "Do not apply this product to your genitals."
So to sum up my wild weekend for the lazy reader out there here are the Cliff's Notes:
1) Broke my middle finger.
2) Mild groin strain.
3) Nearly IcyHotted my balls into oblivion.
posted by Hoss | 11:08 AM
2 Comments:
Coming from someone who has "Tiger Balmed" his nuts into oblivion back in his soccer playing days, I completely feel your pain and then some. My best advice, sit on a pack of frozen peas for a couple days when you're at your desk at home or something.
All I have to say is when I called you on Friday and heard this story I nearly pissed myself I was laughing so hard. I would so make an inappropriate comment about your balls, but I'll restrain myself as this is a rather public forum. Anyway, glad you're feeling better and damn you for not joining my friend Melissa and I at Mamouns on Friday night! haha
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